The Small Things.

Lately I have been noticing little ways in which God has been blessing me. This past week he gave me an overwhelming sense of peace and joy. But it was actually more than that. To me joy is a constant feeling that stays with us whether we are going through sorrow or if we are having a great day. There is an inexplainable "joy" that comes as a result of having a relationship with God. I remember this feeling even as I endured some of the hardest times of my life. But the last few days God has allowed me to feel happiness again. Happiness is a different type of feeling. It comes and goes and is usually a result of our circumstances. Lately I have felt free. I haven't felt this way in a long time. My friend Jess told me that God has been "refining" me. She has said, "I don't know why He is choosing to do this in such a painful way but He is doing it and the result is going to be something amazing." She is so right! God is working on me. He is forming me into the woman that He wants me to be.
I guess the theme of my past week was contentment, laughter and satisfaction. It didn't come from anything huge, just a lot of little things that made a HUGE difference. I tried to record these things so I can look back on them and remember how God cares so deeply for me.
Here is my list:

• Last Sunday, August 24th
• Spending time with my small group after church. We went out to lunch and then all went to Sam's club. I enjoy spending time with these people. For 2 and a half months I avoided John and Danielle when they invited me to small group activities. I was intimidated and insecure for some reason. Now I'm a little upset at myself because I see that I missed out on 2 and a half months of blessing.
• John, Danielle, Zoey (their dog) and I took a nap in their living room before we headed back to church.
• The staff/board meeting last Sunday night. It was so awesome for me to be able to see and hear the hearts of the board members at our church.
  
• Jess came over and spent some time with me. We sat on the couches in my house and talked about nothing for three hours.

• Monday, August 25th
• I usually have Mondays off but I worked this day. Danielle and I accomplished a lot of stuff for the Children's Ministry. I left work with a feeling of satisfaction and pride.

• Tuesday, August 26th
• One of the first graders in my after school program read me his entire reading worksheet. He was learning the sound of the letter "A" like in the word "cat". He was so proud of himself that he knew all of the words! I loved being able to connect with this child.
• I met Jess and Debra at Starbucks after work. They both had things to do because they're in school. I was a complete annoyance to both of them as I distracted them from their work. We ended up staying there for a couple hours laughing and talking.

• Wednesday, August 27th
• I had chapel with the preschoolers at the daycare. I taught a lesson on anger and they all paid attention and were very engaged. They are so precious!
• Danielle, Bill, John and I went to lunch and laughed so hard we cried as John told us a story. I had heard the story before so I knew what was coming but it was Bill's first time hearing it. I looked at him and his face was bright red. He had tears streaming down his face and he was laughing so hard he could barely breathe. Every time I looked at him I laughed harder. We all had sore abs by the end of the lunch.
• I got to have a great conversation with one of the parents from the daycare. She cried when I told her how well her son was doing and how he was blowing me away with his great behavior.
• I spent some time in the kindergarten room. One sweet little boy in that class makes me laugh so hard because he's so cute and he says the greatest things.
  
• God gave me renewed energy as I spent some time with the kids of the youth group volunteers. We watched a movie and hung out while their parents were upstairs with the teens.

• Thursday, August 28th
• Danielle and I had an awesome meeting with our senior pastor. We were able to share with him all of the great things that have been happening in children's ministry and he was very pleased. It felt so good!
• My after school kids are doing better and better everyday. The program is really starting to become what I knew it could be and it makes me proud to know that I had a part in it.
• Jess took me on my first trip to the Goodwill Outlet. That's right people, I said OUTLET. It is a crazy experience. Here's a little clue to how insane it gets in there: everything costs 59cents per pound! Ha!

• Friday, August 29th
• I had the day off and got some much needed cleaning done at my house.
• I spent the afternoon/evening with friends. We had dinner and a bonfire at Jess and Nate's.

• Today
• I slept in and just got back from two hours at the pool. Relaxation, anyone?

So you see, it's the little things that have been bringing me so much happiness lately. Nothing huge has happened. Nothing monumental or life changing. God has just been showing me his love through the way he provides ways for me to smile. I am so content exactly where I am. I know that God has placed me here for a reason. I feel so unworthy to be in such a great place, surrounded by incredible people working at a job that I love. I am so thankful for the small things.